Day 34 Reflection: Grace

“There but for the grace of God go I.”

I hate this phrase with a white-hot passion. First of all, it paints God’s grace as favoritism that preserves some from trials and tribulations while smiting others. Or perhaps it hints at some virtue the speaker possesses that keeps a retributive God from smiting them. Or judges someone for handling their tribulations in a way that makes their life worse.

No matter, the phrase paints a deity that plays favorites in handing out grace and a world of the holy haves and have-nots. 

This is not how grace works at all. The Wikipedia entry for divine grace defines it as:

[…] the divine influence which operates in humans to regenerate and sanctify, to inspire virtuous impulses, and to impart strength to endure trial and resist temptation; and as an individual virtue or excellence of divine origin. (Wikipedia, 2015).

In this context, grace gives us resilience in life. This makes sense, because one of the purposes of religion is to give people meaning in life, particularly helping to make sense of life when bad things happen. 

So divine grace is something all of us have, whether or not we would call it that. It is the sense of greater-than-ourselves that we rely on in the face of loss. Grace plays no favorites; it does not reward some and neglect others. 

“There but for the grace of God go I” is a very comforting construct, because it suggests that God protects the believer from harm or loss. None of us, however, are immune; God does not arrange the lives of Her followers.  It’s a good thing that real divine grace exists to help us through the bad times.

Day 33 Reflection: Justice

A country without social justice is not great.

A country can possess great wealth, or great power, yet it is not great if it neglects its most vulnerable citizens.

A country that subjects its citizens to unequal treatment under the law has imprisoned itself.

A country that cannot reach its hand to feed the poor has starved itself. 

A country that cannot remove obstacles for access by the disabled has crippled itself. 

A country whose immigration policy is based on color and race has exiled itself. 

To make America great again, we must commit to social justice, because we the people are as burdened as the least of us.

Day 32 Reflection: Transcend

A space exists beyond the mundane, one untouched by everyday drama and the pursuit of worldly things. As humans, we are allowed fleeting glimpses of this place.

Some spy it in the forest, when a ray of light pierces the canopy and illuminates the path. Some discover it in service, when the Divine has touched their understanding of the Other. Some find it in prayer, others in meditation, yet others in solving a difficult problem.  Many stumble across it without seeking and are dazzled by its singular beauty.

But only for a moment. We were not meant to dwell in the transcendent, for to do so would destroy what makes us human: our drive, our basic needs, our social connections. We would starve to death in beauty.

Best we go back to our mundane world after touching the transcendent, to live our lives with a little more grace than before.

Day 31 Reflection: Forgiveness

Don’t forgive unless you’re ready to.

This goes against the common spiritual wisdom that we should be ready to forgive our transgressors, that forgiveness sets us free. Maybe that’s true, and we should forgive the person who cut us off in traffic. 

But there are hurts so deep, so debilitating, that easily forgiving them feels like self-betrayal. Forgiving betrayal, murder, assault — all these feel too heinous to forgive. And yet people clamor to tell the sufferer that they should let go, forgive. Often these people who press others to forgive have something to gain — family members of the violator, the church of the violator, the violator themselves. 

Withholding forgiveness gives a sense of power, maintains the anger that may be needed to recover. Anger is not evil; it’s an emotion. Righteous anger helps us see our value, helps us recover. (Rage, however, consumes us and it’s best not to play with anger until it becomes rage). 

There comes a time, though, when the anger holds us in the past, when we’ve grown beyond the hurt, we have found ourselves again. Then it’s time to forgive.

Day 30 Reflection: Suffering

Suffering exists because someone’s basic needs aren’t being met. Food and water, health, safety and security — without enough of these people suffer. Suffering causes distress — fear, anguish, pain. 

Society holds onto a narrative that paints suffering as ennobling. We admire the hungry villagers, the mentally tortured artist, the once-vibrant person dying of cancer. 

We should admire people’s resilience in the face of suffering, but we should not dismiss their suffering as ennobling. We should instead do the humane thing — see what we can do to help reduce their suffering. It may be that we can provide simple help like food and drink. Maybe we work to dismantle unjust structures that cause people to suffer, like reducing racial bias in policing. Even companionship, understanding, and acceptance may be enough to ease suffering.

Suffering is not noble, but weathering it together may be.
 
 

Day 29 Reflection: Sacred

I looked up sacred and found this definition: dedicated to a religious purpose. Religion is defined as

a set of beliefs concerning the cause, nature, and purpose of the universe, especially when considered as the creation of a superhuman agency or agencies, usually involving devotional and ritual observances, and often containing a moral code governing the conduct of human affairs (BBC, 2014).

In other words, the sacred is set apart from secular (or profane) life through belief in a deity or deities and the worship of those deities. How it is experienced differs from person to person, but there is this sense of specialness, this celebration of mystery, that is held separate from ordinary life.

In these days of “spiritual but not religious”, the definition seems to discount the experience of countless people finding deep, transcendent meaning to their lives and experiences without benefit of organized religion and church services. Some people find experiences in nature as sacred, set apart from the mundane moments of their life. Some find their volunteer work as sacred. Panentheists find the sacred permeating all of their life and do not see a separation of sacred and secular.

Apparently, we need to have the sacred in our lives, a glimpse into the infathomable, the Great Mystery. 


BBC (2014). Religions. Available: http://www.bbc.co.uk/religion/religions/ [April 3, 2019].

 

Day 28 Reflection: Wisdom

We are told that our elders hold wisdom (and having just reached AARP age, I certainly hope so). But at the same time, as people get older, many become more resistant to change. 

We are told that wisdom comes from experience, but some people learn nothing from their experiences.

How do we discern wisdom, then?

Wisdom doesn’t bubble up out of fear or anger, although fear or anger may make us reach for wisdom. It rises from the still pool at the center of our being.  It may goad us to act or ask us to wait, but it does so with a sense of what has gone before and a great deliberation. The answer it gives is grounded in humankind’s best nature, deep in understanding.

Do not mistake wisdom with the resignation of “things have always been this way”, or the self-righteousness of “things have always been this way”. Wisdom is not about preserving or giving to the past. Wisdom is about learning from the past and using it for advancing a life, a people, a world into its future.

Day 1 Camp Nano April 2019: The beginning of Gods’ Seeds:

 I’m trying to motivate for April Camp Nanowrimo and a new book. Here’s an excerpt from the first chapter:
 *****

A group of beings — human-like, but with a venerable air for all their apparent youth —  sat in a room whose black crystal-crusted walls shone with reflected light from the molten white floor, from the white and silver table, and seemingly from the participants themselves. The paucity of light did not lessen the sterility of the surroundings. 

“The Apocalypse proved that we, the Archetypes, no longer take our protection of the human patterns seriously,” Luke Dunstan said earnestly, his hands tented in thought. His visage, weathered in contrast to the unlined faces of the other immortals around him, announced that he had become worldly and, unlike most Archetypes, had committed evil — in his case, for the sake of good. Unlike most Archetypes, he had also repented, which gave him a perspective that could be called almost human. 

“But they still embrace evil,” the Baraka Archetype, short and spare like his people, countered. “They fight wars. They envy each other and they commit crimes out of greed.”

“Or out of want, or madness, or jealousy or a dozen other things,” Luke stated, the grimace on his face reflecting a view of reality he knew had wavered from the neutrality of an Archetype. Su, his consort and the Oldest of the Oldest, watched impassively, her tightly curled hair ruddy in the sparse light. She knew how to play the game, Luke noted sourly, something he had lost in his long association with humankind.

“If we give them the full impact of their cultural histories — not just the facts, but the emotions — the fear, the hatred, the xenophobia — “ The Bering Strait Archetype trailed off.

“How do you know it will make them worse? They already have the stories of their peoples’ pasts, and those seem to inspire xenophobia, it’s true. But what if they remember the full impact of the losses of war and weigh it against their hatred — would they decide to fight more? Or would they lay their weapons down?”  Luke paused to take a breath, to calm himself down, to wear the gravitas of the Archetype instead of the passion of humans. “The point is that, if they kill each other, millions of them will not die with each death. If we keep holding the patterns of the humans — “ 

“One of our deaths will kill millions of humans,” Su interjected. “Which is why the Maker created us nearly immortal. Yet Lilith, who held the patterns of all women, was nearly killed by our kind. Can we guarantee this won’t happen again?”

All of a sudden the residents of the room stopped speaking. Luke felt as if a wind had cut through his immortal bones and chilled them for just a moment. Then he felt the weight, a weight of the history of countless descendents of the people of the seax, the knife that gave its name to the Saxons. And then his burdens vanished, and he felt a hollowness inside. The gasps from the others at the table echoed his.

“What — what was that?” The Ibero-Maurasian snapped, breaking the silence..

“I think — Su, did you notice anything?” Luke asked, knowing that Su had not carried humans’ patterns, their cultural DNA, for millennia as all her people, the Denisovans, had long since become extinct.

“Nothing,” Su answered, “except that all of you around me froze for a moment, and slumped forward. As if something had been taken away from you.”

“As it has,” the Bering Strait Archetype murmured. “I think — I think we have lost our patterns, and if we have, the Maker has taken them from us.” He sounded bewildered, as if something more than the weight of patterns had been taken from him.

“I must see — “ the Ibero-Maurasian said, then paused, and Luke knew that she mindspoke another Archetype. “No,” she finally said, speaking slowly as if weighing each word. “I think we are the only ones whose patterns have been taken.”

“But what does this mean?”  the Baraka demanded.

The Arnhem Archetype, theretofore silent, spoke. “I think this means that the Maker has decided for us — He will take our patterns from us whether we are ready to relinquish them or not. And we’re the harbingers of this big change.”

Day 27 Reflection: Gratitude

Everyone knows that gratitude makes people happier. 

Maybe not everyone, but popular psychology instructs us to write gratitude journals, naming a magic three things per day that we feel grateful for. One can find gratitude journals in hard-bound form, in smartphone apps, and in Facebook memes. That’s because gratitude journaling works, according to research in positive psychology (Emmons and McCullough, 2003). 

Some days it’s hard to write anything in the gratitude journal. Days when little things go wrong one after another, we hug those hurts to ourselves as if to use them as currency to bargain with our Maker for better luck. When we fall into negative self-talk, learned patterns of pessimism, we can’t find a thing to be grateful for. Gratitude doesn’t come to mind when we suffer from depression or post-traumatic stress disorder.

I have those days of suffering, given that I live with Bipolar 2, which I’ve been open about in these pages. I also wrestle with negative self-talk. I’ve wrangled these two into submission for the most part, but still depression and darkness pop out at times.

I challenge the darkness with gratitude:

I am grateful for my bipolar disorder, because it has made me take care of myself. I am grateful because it has given me insight into suffering.

I am grateful for getting my manuscripts rejected because it has forced me to work harder and improve my writing.

I am grateful for my struggles because they remind me that nothing is simple in life.