Interrogating the villain — Harold from Voyageurs

Harold strolls up to me while I’m sitting at my computer typing. I feel his presence before he speaks, and I look up.

“Harold Martin,” he says, shaking my hand and sitting down across from me. “But you can call me King.” His air is self-deprecating arrogance, as if the arrogance was a put-on, but I can feel the tentacles of the con reaching out for me.

“Hello, Harold,” I respond firmly. “What can I do for you?”

“I have a favor to ask,” he said smoothly. “No — hear me out.”

I sat there, waited for the pitch.

“You’re writing this book, right? The one where people keep messing up my arm?” He gave me a knife-sharp smile. “There’s no reason you couldn’t let me win, right?”

“Well, except for the fact your goal is the obliteration of humanity, no.” I paused, curious. “Why do you want to obliterate humanity?”

“I want to be best at something. To do something nobody else has done.” His eyes glittered, and I understood at that moment that the suave exterior contained an evil insanity.

I spoke carefully, knowing that I sat across from a madman. “Why do you have to be the best?”

“My brother was always the best. My father said I wasn’t manly enough, and he did anything he could to make me more manly. It worked — I became what my father wanted. Still it wasn’t enough; my brother got all the compliments. I finally found a way to deal with both my father and brother, who disappeared in 2003. Families go missing all the time.” He smiled, and this time it was a genuine smile that reached his eyes.

I felt my muscles crawl, and I counted the steps to the exit.

A bout of depression

I’m sorry — I have been gone for most of a week.

A week is not long enough for people to wonder what happened to me — perhaps I was playing catch-up on my grading (I was), or dealing with student projects (I was), or editing my book (I was).

I was also falling into depression.

The medications are not perfect — some need to be adjusted or even replaced after a while. Stress or tragedy can kick someone into depression, and some medical conditions such as vitamin deficiencies or low thyroid can cause or exacerbate depression.

In depression, my survival mechanism is to just keep pushing myself to go to work and get things done. It’s a good survival mechanism, because it keeps me from digging myself deeper. I may do nothing but sleep when I get home, but I get my work done. It preserves my identity.

I’m on my way back up, and I will be writing again in this space. Glad to be back.

The best use of my time

I have decided to quit NaNo this year. Not because I can’t finish it, but because I don’t need to finish it. I have serious editing to do on everything I write because a bad habit of mine has been pointed out to me (telling rather than showing). My past dev editor didn’t pick these problems up, but the current publishing editor (who missed the problems in my query materials) did. Go figure.

I need to learn to deal with these myself because I don’t know if I can afford another dev edit on the same document. I need to get better, and someday I might be good enough to publish.

I’m scared I’ll never be good enough to publish, but if I can’t find the problems in my writing, I know I’ll never be good enough to. Becoming Kringle can wait — the best use of my time right now is re-editing.

One week down on NaNo …

At the end of the first week of NaNo, I’ve written 16,000 words or an average of 2000 words a day, split halfway between Becoming Kringle and Whose Hearts are Mountains. I’ll be honest — writing lately has been challenging, with a lot of self-doubt after working with one of the publishing editors I tried. This week has been vindicating.

(A hint from case management class to editors of various types: You have to talk about the strengths as well as the failures of a client’s work, not for flattery or reassurance, but to remind the client that the manuscript is worth the work being put into it.)
I’ve finished Whose Hearts are Mountains — by “finished”, I mean “written a very rough draft that has plot holes you could probably drive a truck through, and desperately needs an edit or two.” I remember when I arrogantly thought my drafts weren’t rough and so I sent them out. Writing has been a humbling exercise.
From here on out, all of my words are going to Becoming Kringle. I think this will be more of a challenge, in fact a huge challenge, because I have the barest of outlines to go by.  On the other hand, with yesterday’s snow, it’s beginning to feel a lot like Christmas.

Day 7 NaNo — one week of writing

I’ve finished 14,000 words so far (2000 words average; I like to round things up) and I’m still going. If I have any NaNo readers out there, how are you doing? Post in comments.

I’m nearing the finish line with Whose Hearts are Mountains, which as you recall is a book I started 30 years ago while sleeping through a kidney infection. The thought that it might be done (not done-done, because it needs a fierce edit or two) floors me.

Then it will be back to Becoming Kringle for the rest of my words. I am going to try to stick to the NaNo credo: Write first edit later.

Day 6 NaNo — still chugging

I can’t wait to write again today.

This is what NaNo does to people, I hear — somehow writing without self-censoring (which is necessary to get 1,667 words a day in) — makes your connection to your words and your characters and your plots flow. 
By the end of this, I should have Whose Hearts are Mountains’ rough draft finished, and probably 30,000 words on Becoming Kringle, which I will finish in December as the bells jingle along. 
Off to write. Sorry this is so short, but maybe I’ll drop an excerpt of Whose Hearts are Mountains tomorrow.
Oh, yes — up to 12,000 words as of this morning. 

The Beauty of NaNo

Last night, I hit the 10,000 words mark — twenty percent of the novel is done! No, not really — first of all, there’s the fact that I’m writing between two novels. Second, 50,000 words is not the optimal length of a novel.

But it’s a big, round number, and that’s the idea. Not even NaNo pretends that you’ll have a publishable final product at the end of November. But you’ll have something to start with, or something that you keep to yourself and say, “I wrote this!”

Progress as it stands — I can see the finish line of Whose Hearts are Mountains, knowing that I have a lot of work to do afterward. Richard has restored some of the stuff I took out in the edit of Gaia’s Hands and emphasized things I need to emphasize. He has lots of work to go. It’s nice to think that that novel can be salvaged.

I’m still waiting for the other publishing editor to come up with edits of the first 50 pages of Prodigies. I am beginning to wonder about her — she couldn’t find anything wrong with my query letter, whereas the other publishing editor helped me improve my query letter in ways even I could see. I would work with one of these people again — not so the other one.

I’m beginning to feel like a writer again. That’s what NaNo does for me.

Day 5 NaNo — and a big surprise

Something strange happened on the way to my NaNo count yesterday. I started becoming interested in writing on Whose Hearts are Mountains again. I don’t know how it happened, but I looked at it yesterday after getting my word count yesterday, and I started writing.

NaNo is surprisingly lenient about this — they say you have to write 50,000 words, and they count writing exercises (word sprints) toward this. I suspect I’m legal writing on two books during this time, and if not, I’ll just have to shrug and say “I’d rather ride this wave of success”.

I’m discovering that Whose Hearts are Mountains is going to be shorter than I’d thought at probably 75,000 words. That’s 4500 words more. It’s probably long enough, and it will get a little longer when I come back and add in some descriptive stuff and other editing. But I’m writing more than 20 words a day on it. Yay NaNo!

I’m still writing on Becoming Kringle, and I will probably work more on it as we approach the
In other developments, Richard is editing my problem child (now our problem child), Gaia’s Hands.
The Gaia stories overlap with Apocalypse and Reclaiming the Balance, but deal more with humans. So we’re co-authoring, and wondering if we should have both our names (I vote yes) or the combined pseudonym Lauren Richards (his vote yes).

So I’m re-energized for writing, and anticipate that December is going to be an editing, rather than a writing month.

More NaNo –Day 4

I’ve been doing something different this year for NaNo — I’m not trying to push myself too hard, because I’m afraid I will burn out. I’m writing 1667 words a day, which is the minimum it takes to win NaNo in 30 days. (Ok, I might write more today because it’s only noon but…)

My favorite searches so far on Google: tall slim male body measurements, cool summer seasonal color palette, cool summer seasonal color palette reds, silver grey, cool winter color palette, bright winter, fops, Father Christmas.

I continue pretty much flying by the seat of my pants, and frankly, it’s fun!

Day 2 Summary NaNo

Yesterday, I got to write some villains. Two twenty-somethings in Paris with an eye to the main chance, as they say in England. There are no jewels to heist (if indeed Alex is a jewel thief like he told Clarice) and pickpocketing isn’t lucrative. So why not blackmail?

Clarice knows of a philanthropy that seems, to her, like it’s got something to hide. And she and Alex need to come yup with a project quick, before Alex explodes. So why not Yes Virginia, an organization supposedly there to support Christmas charities?