Tag: amwriting

Progress (I think)



I think I’m through the edit of Prodigies — it’s going to my in-house reader now. The edit was about two things — emotions and plotting. I hope I have those in a better place.

I guess Prodigies will go out on my next querying round, and I’m hoping the beginning now brings agents in. They should get to know the main character now. 

Now, I’m afraid, it’s time to go back to Gaia’s Hands. I would rather prune very prickly roses than go back to Gaia’s Hands, to be truthful. That book needs so much help, being the first one I wrote. It needs replotting and characterization and dilemmas and … I still don’t know if I want to start it from scratch.

I do worry because I haven’t had an idea for a new book for a while (but Whose Hearts are Mountains wasn’t that long ago, either). On the other hands, I want the existing works to be sharp, sparkly, and compelling. I hope I get closer to that.

How Easy it is to Quit

As someone who has started many projects and not finished them, I feel uniquely qualified to talk about how easy it is to quit something.



I have three sourdoughs in the refrigerator downstairs that, if I don’t feed them soon, will expire. I was supposed to feed them yesterday, but said “I don’t want to go through the trouble.” But if I say that day after day, the culture will die out. 

I have to push myself to keep the momentum.

This relates to my writing as well. If I don’t write this blog every day, it will probably expire. If I don’t work on polishing or writing or rewriting daily, I will probably abandon writing. 

The things that are easy to quit have no immediate rewards to keep me going. It’s human nature to seek immediate reward, and it’s human nature to conserve effort. Doing the things that are easy to quit, then, requires a longer view and an ability to find reward in the process rather than the result. 

So I write this blog daily, even though it’s easy to quit. The rewards are nebulous (I average 40 readers a day right now, but hope for more) and I find value in the experience of writing itself. 

A Fresh Set of Eyes


I never appreciated the value of a fresh set of eyes until now.
I’m making some needed repairs on Prodigies right now after not looking at it for a while, and — wow. I am finding ways to make good enough into great (I hope). 

It seems overwhelming at this point, but I know this latest edit is only making my work better. This is one of the reasons I am glad I haven’t decided to self-publish — because I’m impatient and I think my stuff is good coming out of the first draft (it’s not; I just get excited about things) and I would publish before things were “right”.

I love the process of learning my craft. I get so frustrated sometimes when I don’t get an agent or publisher, but then I learn something new (like Save the Cat plotting) and improve my work.

I hope it’s worth it. That’s always the fear, that I’m spending too much time polishing something that may not get published. On the other hand, it’s gratifying seeing something improve even more.


Hubris



I am re-editing Prodigies again, this time for character development of the secondary characters. This whole discovery process has been humbling. I am hoping that, when I tear everything down like this, that what’s left of my work is worth publishing.

That’s the thing — I don’t mind being wrong. I don’t mind not doing things right — who am I fooling? I hate making mistakes and I grovel to the universe every time I do it. But I’m seeing new things every time I do, and I’m fixing new things. (And I have other novels that need the same treatment, damn it). 

Maybe this note is my groveling to the universe. Dear Universe, I’m sorry I made you read my mediocre books. I’m sorry I thought I was a big thing when I was making big mistakes. I’m sorry I ever thought I didn’t need dev editors and beta readers. I am making amends, and I hope they’re good enough.

Now I need to go and write.

What if (COVID-19 version)



What if things will be okay?

What if we emotionally recover from our losses — always remembering, but still living for the future?

What if we find out that money wasn’t what we were looking for?

What if more of us grew gardens as a result of the shortages?

What if we noticed the air was cleaner after quarantine? What if we decided we wanted to keep it that way?

What if we came out of this enjoying our simple outings more?

What if we will bounce back after this — in a new normal, perhaps, but nonetheless?

What if we find something good out of this — if our lives get a bit smaller, a little more precious?

Workarounds




I’m late to writing today because we have intermittent Internet outages here. I’m keeping my fingers crossed because I have two video meetings today — one with one of my colleagues about internships for the summer (which are pretty rocky right now) and one to congratulate some of my interns for a good semester. (This is part of their celebration with a local placement who treats their interns well). 

My home computer is malfunctioning again. Same problem as before (no cursor), except that I haven’t been able to shame it into working again. It apparently has to do with a Windows update. Why is Windows Update killing my computer?

I have become frighteningly tied to my computer during this pandemic. I interact with students and faculty, grade assignments, look up things, surf occasionally for fun, make social contact, write/revise my novels, submit queries … Right now the computer is the only contact I really have with the outside world. Because my files are on Dropbox, I can’t even access them without my fiber connection when the fiber connection goes out.

I am going to have to find some workarounds. I have a wireless hot spot, but it needs some data added to it. We’re going to do that before Richard leaves for work today. I can draft using paper and fountain pen, or even better — I have a livescribe pen that does an pretty good job rendering my handwriting into digital (I bought it for $30 — I highly advise buying gently used high-tech items on ebay or amazon). 

This moment reminds me that there are always workarounds, but sometimes they take effort and money and time to find. Glasses are a workaround for those of us without perfect vision. Insulin is a workaround for people with pancreatic dysfunctions. Cars are a workaround for people who can’t walk 20 miles into work. I’m in a pretty good place for workarounds, although if my computer doesn’t start working properly, there might be an expensive workaround in my future. But one I likely can afford.

We can’t expect people with limited resources to make workarounds without help. This is why the response to quarantine has been so difficult for education. Some of our students don’t have access to computers at home. Some live in large families in apartments and don’t really have privacy. Some don’t have Internet. So we try the best we can to facilitate their education. 

We need workarounds. Because plans aren’t always perfect, because things (and people) break. Embrace the workaround.

The Incomplete Dev Edit

Right now I’m adding for chapters to the beginning of Prodigies, in order to reveal the character better and capture more of the spirit of Save the Cat (in other words, placing the character in her before life, setting a theme, introducing a debate).

What frustrates me is that this book went through a dev editor, and I in good faith thought that I had done what I needed to in the book, only to be tipped off by a thoughtful agent who rejected me: “I loved the beautiful description you started with, but I lost interest in the characters.” I had to figure out for myself, given what I recently learned about plotting from Save the Cat, what I needed to do. This is something I couldn’t have figured out myself, given my familiarity with the characters, and something I needed the dev editor to pick out for me.

I’m ashamed that I sent this out to query with this kind of flaw in it. I have found similar flaws in other books of mine — I start right into the action, and apparently this is bad. 

I wish someone had told me.

The beginning of a novel

I got an agent rejection for Prodigies the other day (that’s been out for a while; I guess it got backlogged) with a difference: The agent explained what she found wrong with the book.

She loved the setting and the beginning descriptions, but she couldn’t get into the characters.

I looked at the novel and realized the reason she couldn’t get into the characters was that I never gave her a chance to.

The beginning of a book, according to Save the Cat methodology, should accomplish a few things: The character in her original setting before the action begins. A theme to the book. The debate where she goes on her path — but perhaps it’s the wrong path.

My book starts with the action — no chance of getting to understand Grace, no way to see Grace in her original setting, In other words, no way to identify with Grace. 

My beta reader didn’t tell me about this, which is worrisome. On the other hand, I am learning enough about the structure of novels that I can fix this (I’m fixing this right now) and hopefully I will be able to incorporate this into new novels.