A Cross-Country Trip

Daily writing prompt

You’re going on a cross-country trip. Airplane, train, bus, car, or bike?

If I were to take a cross-country trip, I would definitely go by train. In that way, I would enjoy the trip without having to drive, and I would see changing terrain through the window or in the observation car. I first experienced this at age seven, when I took a train to Chicago with my family to see the Museum of Science and Industry. Ever since, I’ve been hooked on trains.

I live in the US, and our trains are not superb here, but they’re not bad. If I planned the trip right, I would have a sleeper car, so I didn’t have to sleep propped up in coach. I love sleeper cars because they fit so much in such a tiny space. I always take the top bunk when traveling with my husband so I have to strap myself in the catch net.

I have traveled halfway across the country by train, but not all the way across. I have taken the Lake Shore Limited, which skims the edges of Lake Erie between Albany, New York and Chicago. The best part of the trip is waking up early in the morning to see the sun rise over a (I forgot the name) nature preserve, where the track is surrounded by water on both sides.

I hear that the trains in Europe are better than those in the US, which I believe. My big dream would be to take the Oriental Express. I would also like to take the Trans-Canadian, which I think is also better than Amtrak in the states.

Sigh. I want to take that cross-country trip now.

I Am A Cat

Daily writing prompt

Which animal would you compare yourself to and why?

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I would make a great cat. Not the mighty hunter type who attacks shoelaces and chases bugs on the walls, but a fat, self-satisfied cat lounging on the couch begging to get petted.

Every now and then I would get the zoomies, chasing nothing in particular across the house. I would fall off the couch occasionally while stretching. I would not be a graceful cat.

I would be the epitome of domestication. But I wouldn’t completely forget my ancestors were worshipped by a whole nation. I would let people pet me.

Dealing with Feelings

Daily writing prompt

What strategies do you use to cope with negative feelings?

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I have had to learn several strategies to learn with negative feelings. As someone with bipolar disorder, I have had negative feelings on high volume. Anger, sadness, fear are all ramped up in a bipolar flare-up. I wasn’t medicated for years, so I had to manage things myself. Nowadays, the edge has been taken off the emotions, but they’re still there.

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My first strategy is to take deep breaths. Breathe in to the count of five, hold to the count of five, breathe out to the count of five. This does a good job of taking care of fear and panic, especially when I have trouble sleeping at night.

The second strategy is to not block the feeling. Having the feeling and letting it flow through me helps to keep it from overpowering me. Sometimes the feeling doesn’t want to be banished, which takes me to strategy #3.

My most powerful strategy in the toolbox is cognitive journaling. In cognitive journaling, you identify the feeling and its underlying thought. Then you identify cognitive distortions or thought errors. These include mind-reading (thinking you know what someone else is thinking) or fortune-telling (predicting the future). Identifying errors reduces the strength of the negative emotions. This link will tell you more about cognitive journaling.

I highly suggest doing work on regulating emotions. Although we are all entitled to our emotions, we are not entitled to use them as bludgeons or overwhelm others with our needs. That’s what emotional regulation is about.

Revisiting Flow

Daily writing prompt

What activities do you lose yourself in?

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This question is about flow. Flow is the state during an activity where we lose all track of time while doing it. The activity engages us completely, and it challenges us at an optimal level. Flow provides us with feelings of mastery and an active state much like meditation, and increases our well-being. It’s a psychology term first proposed by Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi.

Writing is my flow activity. This is why I have been alarmed these past few weeks with my writing slump. Flow is necessary for my well-being, and I don’t have another flow activity as a backup. I felt a bit lost these past few weeks.

For the last week or two, however, I have been editing previously written works as a way to get through the slump. This has been a flow activity to me, and I am back to beating the tyranny of feeling the passage of time. It is also giving me ideas for a new novel. Back to flow!

In Praise of Gandalf

Daily writing prompt

What movies or TV series have you watched more than 5 times?

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Every year at New Year’s, my husband and I have a Lord of the Rings movie marathon. Over two days, we watch the immensely long trilogy ensconced on our couch. It has happened at least three times, which, in my reckoning, makes it a ritual.

The movies have aged well. Gandalf is as droll as ever, the Ringwraiths just as menacing, and Aragorn is just as hot. The one obnoxious line in the movie — “Legolas, what do your elf-eyes see?” — is just as annoying. We look forward to seeing it every year.

There are other movies we watch yearly, such as the Patrick Stewart version of Christmas Carol and How the Grinch Stole Christmas in the holiday season. But the marathon of Lord of the Rings is the one I most enjoy.

Superstitious

Daily writing prompt

Are you superstitious?

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Am I superstitious? It depends on what you mean. I don’t believe in any years of bad luck if I break a mirror, nor do I panic with a hat on my bed. Umbrellas in the house? Awkward, but not bad luck. Meeting up with a black cat? No, I bend down and pet them.

I used to believe in curses. Not so much anymore, but once upon a time I believed that my neighbor Aunt Nonie (age 92) cursed me for hanging out with her how many times great nephew when I was 13 and he was 11. If I understood Italian, I’d be able to tell what she cursed me with. Probably never having a boyfriend, and for a while it looked like the curse was working.

I do, however, believe that omens are, well, ominous. A bad event first thing in the morning means an entire bad day. If I see a dead bird, I wonder what the day has in store for me. I once became convinced I got my first professor job in Oneonta NY because there was a nearby town named Laurens (my name is Lauren).

So for the most part, I’m not superstitious. Except for that pesky omen thing. It’s a little embarassing being a grown professor and believing in omens. But there it is.

Shopping Spree

Daily writing prompt

Where would you go on a shopping spree?

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Where would I go on a shopping spree? I assume someone else is footing the bill, right? Otherwise, I would not go on the shopping spree, because if I had the money I would already have gone.

I would like to get the most out of someone else’s money. And if this is a timed shopping spree, I want to get the most out of the time I have. I’m going to go to an Apple Store.

I would like a top-of-the-line MacBook Air, for example. I don’t think it’s too much to ask for. It would be a delightful addition to my iPad. I’d grab a new case for my iPad, and one of those fancy keyboard/stand things that Apple makes for iPads. A new iPhone? Yes, please! We need a new Apple TV, so that would be a wise choice. And accessories! I need accessories!

It’s fun to spend someone else’s money. In reality, though, I will do fine with the computer I have, and with my current electronics. But we do need a new Apple TV.

What’s in a Name

Daily writing prompt

What is your middle name? Does it carry any special meaning/significance?

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I’m going to depart from this prompt and cover both my first and middle names, because the origin of my first name is hilarious.

I was named Lauren after my Uncle Larry. My reprobrate Uncle Larry. My Uncle Larry who would start drinking at 8 AM. The one who collected rents with a gun strapped to his thigh. THAT Uncle Larry. I’m not sure what kind of message this sent to me; I turned out to be a good girl despite that unusual namesake.

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My middle name is Jean, named after my father John. That probably was a bit better of a namesake; my dad was everything Uncle Larry was not. Hard-working, responsible, for the most part calm.

Not a very exciting story, I know. But that’s the story.

The Last Thing I Learned

Daily writing prompt

What is the last thing you learned?

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I learn so much in a day. I read the news, informational websites, and cereal boxes. I almost compulsively seek out information. So much of what I learn, though, isn’t of great import.

How, what, where? – gears concept – 3D illustration

For example, this morning I found out that Gene Hackman, movie star, died with his wife and dog. I didn’t know Gene Hackman and I don’t watch many movies. The event was of great import to him and his family, but not to me.

Last night I learned someone had put a hand-held electric espresso machine on the market. For 150 dollars, I could own my very own gadget. Again, not of great import because although I love coffee, I drink little espresso.

Sometimes what I learn has a more immediately pressing character. Tuesday, I learned that the remote for the DVD player in my classroom was not working. This caused me to revise my lesson on the fly, and I gave a presentation on Flow that I had not prepared for. It didn’t go to the end of the class, but at least I presented something.

As humans, we are always learning. Without learning, we will die, because learning helps us make sense of the world surrounding us. But most of the time we learn, it’s something we hardly notice, because we do it so much.

Destiny is Tricky

Daily writing prompt

Do you believe in fate/destiny?

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I don’t believe in destiny. Or, rather, I believe in something destiny-adjacent. Not the deterministic concept of fate delivering us to our inevitable outcome, but a leading we could be taking.

Leading is a Quaker concept, the belief that God (or whatever divine presence you believe in) is leading us toward an action we need to make. These often point toward right action, or ways in which we can do God’s will. (Keep in mind that God’s will in this case is not the evangelical/supremacist vision, but defending people’s rights, feeding and clothing them, bringing the peaceable kingdom to earth. Pacifist and progressive.)

Leadings can be life disrupting, although I have never had one that defines as that. Quakers have clearness committees so that they can tell whether a leading is divine or just a whim or mistaken desire. Clearness committees are not perfect — I had a clearness committee for my first marriage and it blew up in three years.

I sometimes think writing is a leading. Why else would I write for no monetary recompense and very few readers? I may be called to put on paper the adventures of an agricultural collective and its preternatural visitors, dealing with topics like pacifism and discrimination. I don’t know — it’s been years since I’ve been to meeting and I don’t have a meeting to seek clearness with it. It’s also not disruptive enough to my life — if I wanted to quit work for writing full-time, I would certainly ask for a clearness committee.

I don’t believe in destiny, the belief that we have no control over what happens to us and we’re dragged kicking and screaming into our future. But I believe in leadings.