Prayer for the New Year

I should preface this with the statement that I don’t know that I’m a Christian. I pray to God, but I do not feel comfortable with what Christianity stands for today — a right-wing identity politics that encompasses white supremacists, prosperity gospel, and a xenophobic populace. I am, at heart, a Quaker and a progressive one at that. A large number of Christians would say I’m not really Christian, and I’ll take their word for it.

But I pray:

I pray that we implement the vaccines for COVID quickly and fairly, so that we get a herd immunity of vaccinated people (the only way to get herd immunity without a higher body count).
I pray that we find a safety net for those unemployed by catching COVID or by being let go due to COVID shutdowns.
I pray that we find compassion in our world, especially for those who are discriminated against.
I pray that this country finds a unity in behavior that honors our neighbor, lifts up the downtrodden, and aids the poor no matter their religion, gender identity, sexual orientation, and disability status.
I pray that I find a way to make a difference in my own little corner of the world.

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As I get older, I think differently about prayer. I believe we pray for a reason, but I believe less in that concept of deity that, in effect, grants wishes. Because not everyone’s wishes get granted — and not everyone’s wishes should be granted.

I do believe in what my good friend Mariellen said about prayer, that we give God our troubles and She hands them back in the morning with more strength to deal with them.

I also believe in prayer speaking to that of God in everyone, a good Quaker concept. What if prayer mobilizes those who hear it into action? That being said, I must be at heart a panentheist, believing that God is the gestalt of that of God in everyone, and that God speaks to the whole of humanity to see who will take the message up and create the miracle.

Therefore, when I pray like this, I speak to myself. I speak to the Gestalt. I hope someone listens.

Day 1 Lenten Meditation: Prayer

I’ll be honest — I don’t understand prayer anymore.

By “anymore”, I mean “not since I got put on medication for bipolar disorder. I have bipolar II, and my prayer life spun between being elated and feeling like I had a pipeline to our perception of God, and being depressed and praying in vain. Things are evened out, and my logical mind has taken over and made me question praying.

Does God grant our prayers? I wonder what happens when two football teams pray for a victory. Does God pick his favorite team? Does God bribe the referees? Choose the team that prayed the best?

If God grants our prayers, we rejoice that our prayers are granted. If God does not, we don’t say a thing.

I’m not completely skeptical about prayer, though. I think prayer helps us find something within ourselves, strength or comfort or acceptance. I think that prayer fortifies us to help us face an unfair and unfriendly world.

And prayer helps me find my keys in the mornin.

Day 32 Reflection: Transcend

A space exists beyond the mundane, one untouched by everyday drama and the pursuit of worldly things. As humans, we are allowed fleeting glimpses of this place.

Some spy it in the forest, when a ray of light pierces the canopy and illuminates the path. Some discover it in service, when the Divine has touched their understanding of the Other. Some find it in prayer, others in meditation, yet others in solving a difficult problem. Many stumble across it without seeking and are dazzled by its singular beauty.

But only for a moment. We were not meant to dwell in the transcendent, for to do so would destroy what makes us human: our drive, our basic needs, our social connections. We would starve to death in beauty.

Best we go back to our mundane world after touching the transcendent, to live our lives with a little more grace than before.