Category: Thoughts and Reflections

Up On the Stage

Daily writing prompt
Have you ever performed on stage or given a speech?
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When I was in high school, I did a lot of acting in high school plays. I got the funny roles and did well at them. My approach was to act big and to leave enough time for people to laugh. I didn’t do so well with serious roles, and I never understood why. Probably because I put up a funny front because people made fun of me.

I gave speeches, mostly in the speech class we took sophomore year. I was on the speech team, but was not very good in my event, with no help from the coach, who liked his naturally talented folks. The highlight was winning the county competition Voices of Democracy with a speech advocating conscientious objection. “Did they even listen to this?” my mother asked when I won the award. I think they really liked my voice.

I liked being in the front of the room; this is probably why I became a professor. However, I stepped away from acting and speech when I went to college. I knew I was a big fish in a small pond back in Marseilles, my home town. But when I went to University of Illinois, the pond was full of big fish and I knew I was a relatively small fish. The University is a huge campus, with 40,000 students or so, and is a selective university. We were all smart and came with different talents, and I realized mine were not in the direction of acting. So, other than that speech class in college (which was easy for me compared to the one I took sophomore year of high school), I did not go back to speaking or performing in front of large audiences. Unless you count teaching college.

Weighty Matter

Daily writing prompt
What is one thing you would change about yourself?
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The one thing I would change about myself is my weight. I am, in a word, obese. My lifetime struggle with weight has caught up with me and I am fat.

For people who have never struggled with their weight, the simple answer is “just quit eating so much.” It’s not that easy. I have arthritis in both knees (hereditary weakness) and hips (car accident aftermath) and a lot of weakness when walking certain distances because of a minor cardio glitch. I’m sure I could exercise better if I lost weight, but it’s this catch-22 — I can’t lose weight unless I exercise. Even then, it’s glacially slow, and I’m sure it’s only gotten worse with age.

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I can’t afford Ozempic or Wegovy or one of those other miracle drugs, because weight loss is not considered a medical need. This also means I don’t qualify for bariatric surgery. The only weight loss program that doctors can offer me is a stern lecture.

I am very good at motivating myself, because I do it for my job and for writing and all my daily duties. I can’t seem to motivate myself for weight loss because it’s an impossible task. I will never get to the weight I should be; I never have been able to. And it is, at this point, my greatest wish.

End of Vacation

My mini-vacation in Kansas City is coming to an end. It was our kind of vacation — Thanksgiving dinner at the Savoy, Hotwire lodging at the 21c Art Hotel, breakfast at Broadway Cafe, Black Friday people-watching at Oak Park Mall, lunch at Choga, cats at Whiskers Cat Cafe, and another breakfast at Broadway Cafe.

We bought this year’s Hallmark ornaments at the mall, and these set us back a bit because each of us had three ornaments in the series we collect. I’m not really a Hallmark person, but I do like Mischievous Kittens and Birds of the World. Not so much the dominant culture tie-ins. Richard collects Star Trek ships.

Sunday is my day to recover. Next weekend will be brutal with a lot of grading to do before finals. And then there are finals to grade, so expect me to be scarce. But after these two weeks, I’ll be free for about 3 weeks. Maybe it’s time to write again.

What technology would you be better off without, why?

Surprisingly, this answer is the same one as for a previous prompt: my cell phone.

The same things that make my cell phone indispensable make it the bane of my existence. I can now answer work emails any time of day — or night. I can look up just about anything I need to know at a moment’s notice, making me a repository of useless trivia. It goes with me anywhere, breaking the boundaries of my personal life. It crumbles instantaneous life into a series of searches.

I suppose it’s inevitable that my greatest tool doubles as my nemesis.

Happy Thanksgiving!

I have been doing nothing productive these past few days– no writing, no grading, just reading Regency Christmas romances. The next couple of weeks will be brutal so I need the break.

It looks like I’ll start rewriting the Kringle novel when I’m on Christmas break in a couple weeks.

Today is Thanksgiving lunch at the Savoy Grill, followed by Wicked at the Screenland Armour. Very Kansas City.

Have a very good day, whether or not you celebrate.

A Morning Person

Daily writing prompt
Are you more of a night or morning person?
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Let me explain the extent to which I am a morning person: I get up at 5 AM, usually waking before the alarm goes off. I am wide awake at this point. I write this blog by 6 AM over coffee. I enjoy a leisurely morning before going off to work.

Now, mind you, I pay for this in the evenings. In bed by 8; asleep by 8:30 because I need 8 hours of sleep minimum. I do not love the nightlife. Nor do I love to boogie. (If you are old enough to recognize that song, welcome to your 60s. Or later.)

I have always been a morning person, getting up at 6 AM to go to yard sales with my mom, or venturing out to pick wildflowers with her. (There was the one time I had to keep her from picking flowers in a fenced-in area labeled “Warning: Unexploded Ordnance”, but that’s another story.)

In an ideal world, I would have time for a two-hour afternoon nap and then stay up until 9:30, but life doesn’t let me nap. I have work in the afternoon, and I can’t reschedule it. Oh, well, maybe when I retire.

Something Accomplished

I’m sitting in the controlled chaos of our living room next to a framed poster of the latest book in the Hidden in Plain Sight series, Reclaiming the Balance. It’s due out January 1st, with the usual little fanfare. I am thinking of having an online open house for people to drop in on, but the last time I did that nobody showed up. It is a bad time to expect people to show up, in the US at least.

The posters are a ritual, driven by the fact my cover artist, my niece Rachel, is quite talented and does iconic covers. I give her very little to go on, and it’s like she reads my mind. I have aphantasia, or the inability to picture things in my mind, so it’s very hard for me to imagine how she does this.

I write and I publish. I don’t have too many readers, so I feel discouraged at times. But I know there are so many indie books out there, and I can’t afford expensive marketing that has no guarantee of working. I have to accept things as they are, which is why I print the covers as posters. I want to feel like I’m accomplishing something.

My Pet Peeve

Daily writing prompt
Name your top three pet peeves.
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I will not post three pet peeves, because I hate one peeve with a passion that burns away the other two. I loathe it with a legendary loathing that lingers. I hate it with … enough of that. Let me get to the point:

Hypocrisy. I cannot stand when people profess against something and then turn around and do it. It seems to be part and parcel of intolerance. Ministers who preach the word of a deity who commands us to give to the poor own private jets and palatial mansions. Politicians who denounce the LGBT+ community frequent gay dating apps. “Do as I say, not as I do” is the call of the hypocrite.

I realize, though, that all of us at times are hypocrites. I decry climate change and drive a car. I could justify that with all sorts of excuses, including “there’s no public transportation around here,” but I would be a hypocrite if I recognized others’ hypocricy but not my own. Humans are imperfect creatures who need to believe in our convictions even though we don’t always follow them. I will still loathe the most egregious instances of hypocricy, however.

Almost Writing Again

I think I have the idea on how to re-re-revise this year’s Kringle novel. It’s going to be a little flexible with reality, but not in an unrealistic way. No, that didn’t sound so intelligent. Let me try again. I will have to introduce a slightly unrealistic scenario, but not one that requires a massive suspension of disbelief.

Oglesby Illinois – United States – April 26th, 2023: Exterior of the Starved Rock Lodge in Starved Rock State Park, built in 1933-1939, on a beautiful Spring morning.

The problem has been how to keep my aspiring writer in town and at the lodge for long enough that she actually has time for relationship development from meet-cute to growing interest to the peak, the misgivings, the breakup, and the reconciliation. The writing retreat has to be about two weeks long, and she’s not independently wealthy, so two weeks at the lodge isn’t something she can afford (even though it’s not exorbitantly expensive to stay there).

Enter an artist-in-residence program. This is not completely unrealistic; Amtrak had one a few years ago (that I desperately wished I was well-enough regarded as a writer to receive). There’s no reason the lodge couldn’t have this, and in the winter, which is not the prime tourist season. I know in reality that the lodge I am modelling this after never has a down time and thus would not sponsor an aspiring writer. But it’s theoretically possible.

In this scenario, my female protagonist, a writer, would be invited for a two-week artist-in-residence stay at the lodge, which would last through Christmas. During this time, she would give a book reading, talk to local aspiring writers, and write some features on the area. So she would interview the local Santa and visit the surrounding towns as well as the park. And she would fall in love with the executive chef.

How does she have two weeks for a writer’s retreat if she’s also college faculty? This is the end of her sabbatical, and she will go back to work after the break. Not unreasonable assumptions again.

I think this is doable. All I have to do now is write it.