My First Day as a College Professor.

Daily writing prompt

Tell us about your first day at something — school, work, as a parent, etc.

Over 30 years ago, I started my first faculty job at State University of New York College at Oneonta, mercifully known as SUNY Oneonta. I had moved out east from the midwest and had noted some of the changes in scenery from the flatness of central Illinois to the hills surrounding Oneonta, but I didn’t really feel the culture shock until I met my students.

After I learned how to use a mimeograph machine (complete with its blue-purple master stencil), I stepped into my first classroom and stood in front of the class. One woman asked me what sounded like: “Aw yew a stew-DENT?” (If you have heard someone from Long Island, this is the best I could render the voice.)

“Is this Consumer 257?” I asked.

“Yeaah.”

“I’m the professor teaching this class.”

“I thought yew were a STEW-dent!” In her defense, I was 29 but looked really young for my age.

I discovered that day that about one-third of my students were from New York City and its suburbs, and one-third were from rural counties surrounding Oneonta, and the remainder locals. Downstate students are very different than rural New York students. The downstate students are livelier, while the rural students are a bit more reserved.

Some of my favorite stories come from that period of my life, the five years I spent as a new teacher in upstate New York. But it started that first day, when I was mistaken for a student.

Up On the Stage

Daily writing prompt

Have you ever performed on stage or given a speech?

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When I was in high school, I did a lot of acting in high school plays. I got the funny roles and did well at them. My approach was to act big and to leave enough time for people to laugh. I didn’t do so well with serious roles, and I never understood why. Probably because I put up a funny front because people made fun of me.

I gave speeches, mostly in the speech class we took sophomore year. I was on the speech team, but was not very good in my event, with no help from the coach, who liked his naturally talented folks. The highlight was winning the county competition Voices of Democracy with a speech advocating conscientious objection. “Did they even listen to this?” my mother asked when I won the award. I think they really liked my voice.

I liked being in the front of the room; this is probably why I became a professor. However, I stepped away from acting and speech when I went to college. I knew I was a big fish in a small pond back in Marseilles, my home town. But when I went to University of Illinois, the pond was full of big fish and I knew I was a relatively small fish. The University is a huge campus, with 40,000 students or so, and is a selective university. We were all smart and came with different talents, and I realized mine were not in the direction of acting. So, other than that speech class in college (which was easy for me compared to the one I took sophomore year of high school), I did not go back to speaking or performing in front of large audiences. Unless you count teaching college.

Weighty Matter

Daily writing prompt

What is one thing you would change about yourself?

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The one thing I would change about myself is my weight. I am, in a word, obese. My lifetime struggle with weight has caught up with me and I am fat.

For people who have never struggled with their weight, the simple answer is “just quit eating so much.” It’s not that easy. I have arthritis in both knees (hereditary weakness) and hips (car accident aftermath) and a lot of weakness when walking certain distances because of a minor cardio glitch. I’m sure I could exercise better if I lost weight, but it’s this catch-22 — I can’t lose weight unless I exercise. Even then, it’s glacially slow, and I’m sure it’s only gotten worse with age.

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I can’t afford Ozempic or Wegovy or one of those other miracle drugs, because weight loss is not considered a medical need. This also means I don’t qualify for bariatric surgery. The only weight loss program that doctors can offer me is a stern lecture.

I am very good at motivating myself, because I do it for my job and for writing and all my daily duties. I can’t seem to motivate myself for weight loss because it’s an impossible task. I will never get to the weight I should be; I never have been able to. And it is, at this point, my greatest wish.

What technology would you be better off without, why?

Surprisingly, this answer is the same one as for a previous prompt: my cell phone.

The same things that make my cell phone indispensable make it the bane of my existence. I can now answer work emails any time of day — or night. I can look up just about anything I need to know at a moment’s notice, making me a repository of useless trivia. It goes with me anywhere, breaking the boundaries of my personal life. It crumbles instantaneous life into a series of searches.

I suppose it’s inevitable that my greatest tool doubles as my nemesis.

A Morning Person

Daily writing prompt

Are you more of a night or morning person?

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Let me explain the extent to which I am a morning person: I get up at 5 AM, usually waking before the alarm goes off. I am wide awake at this point. I write this blog by 6 AM over coffee. I enjoy a leisurely morning before going off to work.

Now, mind you, I pay for this in the evenings. In bed by 8; asleep by 8:30 because I need 8 hours of sleep minimum. I do not love the nightlife. Nor do I love to boogie. (If you are old enough to recognize that song, welcome to your 60s. Or later.)

I have always been a morning person, getting up at 6 AM to go to yard sales with my mom, or venturing out to pick wildflowers with her. (There was the one time I had to keep her from picking flowers in a fenced-in area labeled “Warning: Unexploded Ordnance”, but that’s another story.)

In an ideal world, I would have time for a two-hour afternoon nap and then stay up until 9:30, but life doesn’t let me nap. I have work in the afternoon, and I can’t reschedule it. Oh, well, maybe when I retire.

My Pet Peeve

Daily writing prompt

Name your top three pet peeves.

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I will not post three pet peeves, because I hate one peeve with a passion that burns away the other two. I loathe it with a legendary loathing that lingers. I hate it with … enough of that. Let me get to the point:

Hypocrisy. I cannot stand when people profess against something and then turn around and do it. It seems to be part and parcel of intolerance. Ministers who preach the word of a deity who commands us to give to the poor own private jets and palatial mansions. Politicians who denounce the LGBT+ community frequent gay dating apps. “Do as I say, not as I do” is the call of the hypocrite.

I realize, though, that all of us at times are hypocrites. I decry climate change and drive a car. I could justify that with all sorts of excuses, including “there’s no public transportation around here,” but I would be a hypocrite if I recognized others’ hypocricy but not my own. Humans are imperfect creatures who need to believe in our convictions even though we don’t always follow them. I will still loathe the most egregious instances of hypocricy, however.

Special Foods

Daily writing prompt

Do you or your family make any special dishes for the holidays?

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I taught a lesson in my classes that covered the question “what shapes our tastes and preferences?” The questions asked of my students were as follows:

What did you have for dinner last night?
What did your family typically have for dinner?
What were special holiday foods?
What was the most unusual food you’ve eaten?

The first and second questions covered items like availability and ease of use. Sometimes dinner reflected the cultural exchange of foods into our society (if they said, for example, pizza and spaghetti). The third question, though, hit upon the idea of food as cultural expression.

Holiday foods were typically traditional cultural foods — the typical Thanksgiving dinner for example. US Thanksgiving turkey and stuffing come from the near-legendary first Thanksgiving, but run through a British colonial filter. (The original Thanksgiving dinner featured venison and fish, not turkey. The turkey is the American bird version of the goose served at Christmas in Britain.)

Sometimes students’ special holiday foods included cultural celebrations. Often they weren’t aware until they learned not everyone eats ollebollen (fried round raisin dumplings) at New Year’s. Others were aware that their German or Swedish heritage meant special Christmas cookies.

That being said, what were my holiday foods? I think of my dad’s side of the family, who descended from people who hunted and trapped and fished as their livelihood. Holiday meals had to include foods that could have been procured by my ancestors. For example, my grandfather smoked trout and that would go on the Thanksgiving table. We would have duck or goose — storebought, but something my ancestors would possibly serve. My mother’s family would make the more traditional thanksgiving, but oil and vinegar coleslaw would be on the table. (I don’t know if this was because we had German ancestry or because mom made really good oil and vinegar coleslaw. I have her recipe because it was straight out of the Betty Crocker cookbook.)

This year I’m eating at a restaurant for Thanksgiving because there’s only two of us. This is what happens in the US as the oldest generations die; the grandparents become the nucleus with their children and grandchildren as satellites. We have no children or grandchildren, so my husband and I are a unit of two. This works fine for me.

If I didn’t need sleep …

Daily writing prompt

If you didn’t need sleep, what would you do with all the extra time?

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I can hardly imagine not needing sleep. Sleep feels like a blessed release from the mental demands of the day, and I enjoy going to sleep as if it were a chosen activity rather than a necessity. I have (because of my bipolar) had episodes where I couldn’t sleep, and it’s an aggravating feeling. For the sake of this exercise, however, I will imagine not needing sleep without consequences to my body or psyche.

The first thing I would do more of is read. Not the internet, but real books, because I would have time to get into them. I would find a comfortable spot to read and l would relax. My bed could be used for a place to relax because I would not be sleeping there.

I would look at the night sky more. All the interesting astronomical bits such as meteor showers and auroras happen late at night, when I am sleeping.

I would write. I wonder if inspiration would be easier at night when all was quiet?

I would meditate. As I would miss sleeping, it would be good to have that time when I can shut off my mind.

All of this is predicated on the belief that others would be asleep, and I would have the peace and quiet to pull off my plans. If nobody slept, this time wouldn’t be free. Bosses would expect more overtime and household chores would overtake us. Then I would certainly prefer sleeping.

CATS

Daily writing prompt

What are your favorite animals?

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I think it’s clear to anyone who has followed me for any time that my favorite animals are cats. (Dogs and goats are tied for second place).

Why cats? First, because of all of their moods. My cats are silly, aloof, affectionate, grumpy, sleepy, and content. They remind me a lot of me in their variety. And they have no trouble telling me what mood they’re in.

Second, because they’re amusing. Whether doing zoomies, jumping into the bathtub until it starts filling up with water, or defiantly standing on a high surface, cats’ antics leave me chuckling. Sometimes they’re not so amusing, such as when they climb up a Christmas tree (who am I kidding? If they’re climbing up someone else’s Christmas tree, it’s hilarious), but for the most part cats are funny.

Third, because they’re beautiful. Even my chunky cat Chloe possesses a beauty that makes me envious. They flow, they slink, they’re smooth and powerful. (Except for Chucky, who lumbers and plunks).

Having three cats in the house has been a cornucopia of experiences. I can’t imagine being without cats. If I were, my house would be that much less comforting.

Beach or Mountains? Nah.

Daily writing prompt

Beach or mountains? Which do you prefer? Why?

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Which do I prefer — beach or mountains? If I had to choose between those two, I’d say mountains. I loved the Catskills when I lived out in upstate New York, and I used to stay near the Adirondacks in a campground.

But I really prefer forests. I want the cabin in the middle of the woods where I can have a writing retreat. I want trees outside my window and the possibility of deer in my backyard. I want misty mornings and rain through the branches. I want the fire in the fireplace against the chill outside.

This might be why I like to go to Starved Rock State Park so much. We stay in a cabin; although it is not in the middle of the woods, trees surround the cabins. The park’s trails and sandstone bluffs are wooded. The park is one of my favorite places on earth.

I guess I’ll go to the mountains if the opportunity arises. At least it has trees.