I am writing, although my output on this book seems to be more like 600-1000 words a day. I don’t think the book is as unsalvageable as I did before, but I’m still not feeling it.
I think the drop in writing progress is because I don’t have my identity wrapped up in being a writer these days. Most writers, it turns out, sell few or no books, and that means little or no recognition. I became a writer for the wrong reasons, it seems; I wanted people to read my stuff and tell me it was good.
In the midst of that, I found out that I really liked writing. I loved writing in my little world, and I got to know my characters pretty well. I became a writer, in other words.
I don’t know what the remedy is for not feeling like a writer. Is there one?
We decided to stay in Des Moines overnight to break the trip back into a couple of days. Des Moines is a comfortable big city; I could live here. Richard, on the other hand, is worried about the snowy weather, which we are not having right now. It’s 46 degrees out and perpetually rainy. We’re waiting out the dense fog advisory south of us, so we’re at a Starbucks so I can write.
I’m bouncing ideas off Richard for a future novel in the Hidden in Plain Sight series. Apparently six is not enough. I like the characters in the series too much to quit writing. Right now, it involves the desert commune, Hearts are Mountains, and threats to the Archetypes there. If you’re preternatural beings with lots of power, this shouldn’t be much of a problem, right? But there’s the part where you don’t want to reveal your true, near-immortal identity. And the part where you used to be guardians of the humans, charged with keeping their ancestral memories, but as guardians you also can’t allow yourselves to be killed. The threat extends to the first child born in the commune, and the collective is immoderately protected of him… The story needs much more thought, but leave it to say there are problems with just killing the aggressors, and problems in not killing them. This is just an idea. There are other ideas, and we have another 2.5-hour drive to come up with them.
It would be nice if this story idea would break my writers’ block. I have been taking a break from writing because it’s not coming easily for me. I’m fighting the usual misgivings that come with being a writer. I have heard I would have these misgivings even if I were a writer on a contract like few lucky writers are.
Does the world need to hear my stories? Probably not as much as I need to tell them. But I always keep hope.
I’m in the busy time of year — grading upon grading; major assignments coming due — and that doesn’t bode well for writing. I am about 1/4 through the re-conceived version of this year’s Kringle novel and stymied because I just don’t have the mental bandwidth to write. I have plenty of time to finish it, as I’m not doing NaNoWriMo. I just don’t have time right now.
The thing I used to teach (and will teach again) in resource management — the importance of a task and the motivation toward the task should match. Nothing more motivating than angry students who need that assignment to be graded. Luckily I’m motivated to do the important task of grading, or at least motivated enough. Some music to motivate should help.
My top priority is to get the assignment graded. From there, other work. Maybe I will get to write this afternoon.
I’m trying to find a substitute for NaNo, as I will not be doing it this year because of their stance on AI. So far, the only thing I have found is in French, which will not happen, as my French is negligible. I need to find a word count motivator that doesn’t cost me any money.
I did a search on the Internet and found a few. The one I decided to use was MyWriteClub, which is a simple word count tracker. It doesn’t have the bells and whistles and community of NaNo, but it is a word count tracker. The one problem with it is that, when I made my account and goal, it made me start it today instead of November 1. So I guess I’m writing today.
What do I do when I don’t like where the story is going?
I have this problem with the two works in progress that are not currently in progress. One of them has a main character problem. The main character is a cipher, which is as it should be, as he is keeping a big secret. The thing is that the progression of their relationship seems vapid as a result. Which it might well be, given that he’s keeping a secret, but it’s not good storytelling at the moment.
The other book? The plot got so convoluted that not even I know what’s going on. Why are they going to the planet where they expect the bad guys to be waiting for them? I’m not sure I’ve given them compelling reasons to do something this stupid.
So what do I do? The first thing I do is avoid writing for a while. This is obviously not a good strategy, but this is a blog post about what I do, not what I should do. I’m edging toward the end of my writing hiatus, so I have to try the next step.
Next I start doing some writing exercises. I need to interrogate the two characters in Walk Through Green Fire, explore where they’re at right now and how they feel about it. Interrogating the character is interviewing the character, except for the tricky part that they don’t exist. It helps me get into the character’s motivations.
Then, hopefully I’m in the space to write. If not, I abandon the book and start on another project. I’ve already done this with Walk Through Green Fire once. It may be a fundamentally flawed work, I’m not sure. Or something I’m not willing to write because reasons. In which case, I need to find a new novel. Maybe it’s time to do the Kringle novel for this year.
I have written nothing substantial for almost three weeks. I am panicking.
Writing is my flow activity, yet I don’t feel like writing. I have no ideas possessing me; the item I was writing seems to have bogged down. I have briefly thought of putting the writing down, doubting my ability to write. Standing at a crossroads, I ponder the path I will take (and cringe at this sentence.)
I need to get motivated. I need something to write, something that captures my imagination, which seems to have gone on strike. Not necessarily to get another novel written; I have too many novels already. But just to write something.
It’s Monday, and I’m not feeling motivated. I spent the morning working on class-related work and got quite a bit done. I promised myself I would write on my book in the afternoon if I got my classwork done. Now it’s afternoon, I am two and a half chapters from done with this book, and I do not know where I’m going.
I’m procrastinating by reading Facebook, and by writing this (although I consider this more of a warmup than a procrastination.) What can I do to keep from procrastinating?
Break the task down into smaller tasks. I have about 1000-1500 words to write to finish this chapter. Can I break this down into three groups of 500?
Put a motivator at the end of this task. If I get done, I can … play on the Internet. Or nap. Napping sounds fun.
Start doing the task for 15 minutes, promising myself that if I am still not feeling it, I can quit.
These are my go-tos for procrastination. See you in 15 minutes.
I write better at Starbucks. It’s official. I’m at Bux and I’ve written 500 words without a lot of effort. Yesterday’s writing looks better. Apparently, it takes a hot lavender latte for me to get writing done.
Or maybe it’s the split mind thing. Part of my mind is paying attention to the activities around me. Two of my acquaintances are talking at a table to my left; a group of women my age or a little older are chatting behind me. To my right, the baristas are puttering around behind the counter. There’s some innocuous background music playing. While all this is happening, I am picking words and writing this. It’s so much easier when there’s noise in the background than it is in my silent home.
My phone is lavender, however.
Or maybe it’s because I’m writing on my road warrior gear. This consists of an iPod Pro, a Logi keyboard and mouse setup, and a cable to plug in for power. (All in lavender). The keyboard feels springier than my laptop keyboard, and the colors are more stimulating. And my setup can go just about anywhere (with the exception being someplace without a table).
I have to fix my home space to make it easier to write. I said this yesterday, but today it’s obvious that I write better out in public. Or at least at Starbucks.
I have trouble motivating to write in my house, preferring Starbucks and its optimal level of distraction. But, as the temperature outside is getting up to 94 today, I’m stuck at home. I’m now working on how to make motivating space at home.
My writing nook is the loveseat in the living room, because our office is a claustrophobic experience with too many bookshelves and not enough room to think. The library table is right in front of and facing a wall. Even though I’ve put posters on that wall based on book covers my niece has designed, I’m staring at a wall. Maybe they’re too high on the wall, I don’t know. To the right is one of these posters; my niece is rather talented. If it weren’t for that? I still doubtless wouldn’t write well in the space, because it’s too isolated as well. I enjoy having people in my space, even if I ignore them.
The living room has its advantages. I have a table for my laptop that scoots up to the couch. I have control of my music on iTunes on my laptop and send it through Apple TV to decent speakers. I play modern classical and all the iTunes playlists that tout ‘focus’ and ‘concentration’. When my husband is around, I have that person distraction, and that helps. But sometimes there’s too much distraction, like when Chloe crawls all over me or tries to clean my nose.
I still feel distractions, though. I stare out the window less (my ‘thinking mode’), and slink off to Facebook and Reddit more, which cuts down on thinking time. If that’s the problem, I can focus my solution on staying on the current page. What would help me with that?
Or I could choose to do something else. There are promotion-related items I could always do. I could take a break from the novel to write a short story. Or I could just take a break. It’s Sunday, and I have the rest of my life to write.
Sometimes motivators help us through dark creative doldrums.
I made some graphics for advertising Gaia’s Hands and Apocalypse, which I advertise on Twitter and Instagram and Facebook Pages. The graphics are based on the book covers and feature the impressive art of my niece Rachel.
I took the graphics and enlarged them to poster size and had them printed through Canva. They are now framed and ready to hang in my office over my desk.
The posters look professional and will save me through many moments of impostor syndrome.
Words Like Me 