Two Days Till NaNo

Two days till NaNoWriMo (National Novel Writing Month) and I think I’m ready. Mostly ready. Not ready at all.

I’m not writing a new Christmas romance this year because I don’t really feel moved to. I don’t have a plot. I still love Christmas but don’t know what I can say about Christmas romances lately. Maybe I’m getting away from romance?

I’m in renegade mode this year, which means I’m working on something non-novel-writing. In my case, I will be editing the book I just finished, Avatar of the Maker. It needs a lot of help, even before the “put it in a drawer and let it sit for a while” stage. Baird is not developed enough and his disagreements with Leah aren’t developed enough and … trust me on this. I need to revise right now.

Sometimes I win NaNo (50k words or the equivalent), sometimes I don’t. But I always try.

I’m Done!

Ok, that was random. I’m done writing Avatar of the Maker, at least the first draft.

It needs a lot of work, enough that I don’t know where to start. At the beginning, I suppose. I think I need to make lots of notes on it and I don’t know whether to make these on paper or on electronic sticky notes. Or both; some of these notes are on the overall body of the book and others are specific. Writing a novel is hard; editing is harder.

I think I can describe the novel in one sentence: One death in this battle could kill millions.

In a paragraph: Leah Inhofer sees visions of a battle held in a dim place. Her best friend, Baird, draws her from her sheltered upbringing by his very existence as a Nephilim. They meet with Luke, a near-immortal Archetype who reels from the loss of the human patterns he carried. The battle Leah sees will happen, a battle of Archetypes. One death in this battle could kill millions of humans. Leah knows that she must act to stop the battle, at the risk of her life. She carries the responsibility as the Avatar of the Maker, who has the power to change the flow of reality.

My mind is already working on the book cover. That’s a long way from now.

Two Personal Goals

What was the hardest personal goal you’ve set for yourself?

The prompt above leads me to two different answers. What was the hardest personal goal I’ve set to myself?

The first: In 2000, I participated in the Susan G. Komen 3-Day Walk. To do this, I first had to raise $1000 for the organization. For the walk itself, I had to walk 20 miles a day for three days. This meant I had to train for the event by walking further every day. I started at two hours a day to a two day 13/14 mile event.

I survived the walk with a few blisters and a lifetime experience. The fundraising was the hard part, with a chunk of the money provided by Walter Cronkite. Yes, the most trusted man in America Walter Cronkite. (Anyone younger than boomers should look him up). No, I didn’t know him. But a friend of a relative of his called in a favor. Sometimes, I guess, the stars align.


The second: I wrote my first novel. I’ve been writing since third grade, when a teacher (who didn’t realize she was teaching 3rd-graders a high school curriculum) taught poetry. I remember doing well in haiku, struggling a bit with diamanté, and being totally overwhelmed with sonnets. I wrote my first published poem that year, if the classroom’s front door was a publication. I went on to write descriptions, short stories, a short play, more short stories … But never a novel. I thought I had irredeemable problems with plotting a long story.

Many many years after that, my husband is responsible for my writing my first novel. I was writing several stories around the same characters. I was almost obsessed with them. Richard said to me, “If you’re going to keep writing short stories, you might as well write a novel.” My instant response was “I can’t write a novel. I have irredeemable problems with plotting a long story (or something like that).

I started writing, and admittedly I did have problems with plotting at first. My novel read like a bunch of short stories at first, and I rewrote it three times until I came up with a result I liked. My other novels didn’t have the same fault as I learned the narrative shape of a novel. The first novel (not the first published) was Gaia’s Hands, which has been published on Kindle.


For honorable mention, I should mention learning how to drive. I didn’t learn to drive till I was 32. The first time I took drivers’ ed in high school I failed for stopping the car in the middle of the railroad tracks to check for trains. (It’s not incomprehensible if you take into account I have a learning problem with spatial and sequential relationships.) The second time, I barely passed but didn’t feel comfortable enough to drive. I learned for real at 32 with the most talented drivers’ ed teacher there ever was. There is talent involved in teaching people to drive. There’s patience, there’s talking someone out of quitting, and there’s the ability to explain things in a way that someone who processes things differently will understand.


I appreciate the goals I’ve struggled with more deeply than the ones that came easy to me. They built more of my character. They became the accomplishments I judged myself by. It’s strange, because I have a PhD and I don’t weigh that among my greatest accomplishments. My greatest accomplishments have been the hardest.

Interrogating Forrest Gray

When I have a new character for a future writing (in this case a short story), I feel compelled to have a conversation with them. To interrogate them, as it were.

I walk into the cafe, looking around for the young man I’ll meet for coffee. One of the great things about being a writer at age 60 is that you can have imaginary coffee with good looking young men.

My coffee date sits in the back corner. Not tall, and not big, he leans back in the chair reading a book. His black hair falls just past his shoulders.

He looks up and smiles as if it’s a habit of his. I know his father and his mother; it tracks. Deep brown eyes and a short nose, an oval face, the face of the Siberian aboriginals, the face of the Bering Strait Archetype’s Nephilim son.

“I was wondering when you would catch up with me.” Forrest put down the book, which I noted was on natural dyeing techniques. I had heard Forrest had apprenticed himself to Elaine and her fiber arts at the collective.

“Elaine has just forgiven me for how much fermenting Chinese indigo smells.” Forrest raises his eyebrows; he has his father’s charm and his mother’s gift with words. “Luckily, I’m not dyeing at her space; Janice found a spare corner of her barn space she’s letting me use.”

“Aasha hasn’t needed you at the infirmary lately, has she?” Forrest’s talent was the knitting of bones, of skin, and oddly the knitting of wool.

“No, but Baird had a kid — a baby goat — who had broken his toe. We fixed that up for him. Cute little kid. I’ll be honest, I don’t like using my gift, but it’s better that we have it for emergencies.”

“I’m curious,” I said. “Are you planning on staying at Barn Swallows’ Dance?”

He brushed back his hair. “I think so. I couldn’t use my talents outside, you know. I don’t know what an ordinary doctor would make of me, although I’m told we are within tolerances of human. And my mother’s here, still trying to figure out how I grew up so quickly.”

“You were born grown-up!” I grimaced at him.

“She knows that, of course. She knows she didn’t sign up for an ordinary family.”

“Does your dad still visit?” I asked cautiously.

“All the time. He’s become fascinated with Barn Swallows’ Dance, particularly in the dinner menu. And he still courts my mother, who considers him ‘not bad for a man’.” Forrest laughed. “I think they’re quite the couple despite that.”

“What do you do at the collective when you’re not fixing bones?”

“A little of everything. I’m on sheep-shearing duty, and I’m trying to figure out the alpacas. I work with Jeanne, particularly in grafting trees; we’re working on better apricots in the food forest right now. I’m trying to take over the coffee roasting from Jeanne, but she caught onto that pretty quick.”

I ask my last question, wondering how Forrest will answer. “What are you looking for?”

“I don’t know. I am looking for something, or maybe something is looking for me. My father was never a mystic; an Archetype’s relationship with the Maker is rather prosaic. My mother, on the other hand, believes in things. Probably because she’s from Barn Swallows’ Dance. I’m just waiting, though, for it to show its face.”

I haven’t written for a couple of days, and I have little time to write today. I feel like writing, because I haven’t written on my book, either. 

Things have been going well. After the author fair I attended on Sunday, I watched my flat cart roll down a hill at an alarming speed1. Luckily, it hit no cars. Sometimes “going well” is relative. 

I have a very busy couple of weeks. Internship visits today and tomorrow. Wednesday I have a moulage2 session for the Northwest Missouri Docudrama (don’t drink/text and drive simulation), followed by an internship presentation. Thursday should calm down, but the following week is Missouri Hope, the major moulage event of the year. 

I’m hoping to carve out some time to write between these happenings and the usual tasks to teaching and grading. A little Starbucks time would be nice. At least I got to type this out.

ALSO: Kringle on Fire is live on Amazon!

  1. The 900 block of Jules St., St. Joseph, MO. ↩︎
  2. Casualty simulation. Making people into victims for training purposes. ↩︎

A Bit of Writer’s Block

I need to go back to writing on Avatar of the Maker, as I have only written about 2000 words in the past week. I could get it written in a month if I could get 1000 words a day. The problem is that I’m not eager anymore because of the remaining part being before the big ending and after Leah’s pregnancy revelation.

What would it take to get more eager? I need to talk to Baird. Baird is one of the male protagonists (this is not a love triangle!) He’s half-human, half immortal Archetype, and he’s in love with Leah. He’s a deliberate person, and could be accused of being slow by someone who didn’t know better. He’s a marshmallow in romance parlance.

I need to find his orneriness. I need to find his edge. I need to see him be worthy opposition to headstrong Leah. This part is murky and I don’t know where to go. How frustrating.

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A Book Fair and Imposter Syndrome

I am selling my wares at a book sale at the end of the month. I have only done one book fair before, a couple of years ago. That book fair was in my small home town’s library, and this next one will be down the road in St. Joe, three times larger.

I think I know what I’m doing. I have books: Gaia’s Hands, The Kringle Conspiracy, Kringle in the Night, It Takes Two to Kringle, and Kringle on Fire. I have business cards (I think). I have handouts featuring all my books, including Apocalypse (coming soon!) I have giveaways (squishy apples) and a “vertical” (a visual element; mine is a driftwood tree branch with hanging apples).

I still feel way out of my league.

I feel like a newb, even though I have been writing and selling books for years. (Writing a lot more than selling, to be honest.) I don’t feel like a grownup when I promote myself. I don’t feel like a professional when I promote myself. I feel like an imposter!

I have to remind myself: I’ve earned money doing this. Therefore I’m a professional. Therefore what I do is professional.

I’ll keep telling myself that …

Friday Afternoon, NOT winding down…

I type this as I wait for 4:30 on the clock to release me from coffee hours at the on-campus Starbucks. We have the best Starbucks at the university — it’s in the university library. So our library is like a Barnes and Noble except it’s set up for studying.

I’m not winding down after this, even though it’s a weekend. I’m celebrating my birthday in Kansas City this weekend. (I’ll be 60 on Monday). It’s a me sort of weekend. We’re heading down tonight and staying at the 21c, which is an art hotel! (If anyone there has watched Middleman years ago, it’s like “Artcrawl!”). We’ll watch Miyazaki movies, eat Thai for dinner, write, and hopefully go to a cat cafe and consider adopting a little furry creature. We’ll see about the latter.

I’ve been getting a lot done these past few days — I have replaced the cover to Gaia’s Hands with its new look. My niece Rachel is very talented:

I also have put both the October 1 release (Kringle on Fire) and the January 1 release (Apocalypse) online. Putting together the covers is perhaps the hardest part, because I have to tweak the cover to fit the book. Whee!

I need a good slightly unrelaxing weekend now!

Why do you blog?

Sometimes I don’t know why I blog. I do not have very many readers, so few would miss it I stopped writing. But I still blog.

I could blog because I love writing, but I have 4 books published, two on the way, three waiting for publication and two in the process of writing. I have plenty of writing in my life.

I think I blog because of hope. I hope to have more readers, and I will never have them if I give up hope.

For those who are reading me now, you give me hope.

A Long Weekend

It’s Labor Day weekend, and I am already celebrating during my Friday coffee hours. My weekend is going to be full of book work. I realized I am going to have to do some heavy work to get Kringle on Fire put together. I need it published by a week from today so I have copies when I go to the Author Fair on September 30th.

I’ve already processed the text for publication using Atticus, which gives the work visual polish (Vellum does this as well, but is Mac-only.) The part I’m struggling with is the cover. It’s almost like I forgot how to make a cover. One royalty-free photo, a back cover, words (some sidewards) and — it doesn’t fit as an 5×8 cover according to the publishing site KDP (Kindle Direct Publishing). So that’s what I’m going to do tomorrow. If I get far enough ahead this weekend, I will try to do the same for Apocalypse. I have a cover for that, but I think it will fail as well.

I registered the copyrights for both books today. At least I got that done. I don’t know if that’s absolutely necessary, but I copyright my published works with the US Copyright office. I’ve been hearing of people on Kindle plagiarizing others’ works. Having the copyright is going to be a big cease and desist there.

There’s a lot of work with publishing a book that has nothing to do with writing. Traditional publishing entails less work, as one only needs to approve the book cover instead of creating it. One doesn’t have to do the bulk of the publicity, although there are promo tours. The self-publisher does more work on their own, but this is not a bad thing by any means.

I’m going to have a busy weekend, with some of it spent at Starbucks for a change of scenery. It’s part of publishing, and it’s part of what keeps me going. Wish me luck.

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